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The Introverted Leader: Career Development and Networking Advice for the Quiet Among Us
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The Introverted Leader: Career Development and Networking Advice for the Quiet Among Us
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Segment:0 .
Hello, everybody. So we're going to go ahead and get started. So thank you all so much for coming today. So my name is Julie Nash and I'm senior director of partnership development with j. And j editorial within WileyPLUS partner solutions. And so I'll be moderating our session here today in this session has taken a little a bunch of twists and turns over the years.
It was first proposed back in 2019 to be part of the 2020 program, but unfortunately was a casualty of the pandemic. And then it's popped around a couple times as various ideas and webinars and such. So we're so happy to have the session. Introverted leader career development and networking advice for the quiet among us here on our stage today. And I'm very happy to be joined by 3 excellent panelists and they'll all introduce themselves here in a minute.
And our session style today is going to be a Q&A session. So we have a number of set questions that will handle first, but then we're going to kick it all out to you for various audience questions. And certainly you can post anything in the app. And Stephanie is going to be helping us with the app questions as well as some audience engagement moments that we have throughout the program today. So before we get started, I'd like to just set the scene a little bit about the topic that we're going to talk about today.
So while extroverts tend to be more seen and more heard, research shows that at least a third of our coworkers are introverts. Members of our teams are the ones that prefer listening to speaking, who innovate and create, but dislike self-promotion, who favor working on their own rather than working in teams. Many amazing achievements have come from self self-described introverts like Rosa Parks and Bill Gates.
In this session, we'll discuss how introverts can advocate for themselves in the workplace, making career aspiration, aspirations and contributions known. And we hear from our panelists who are also self-described introverts about the tips that they have for everyone here on how to navigate the workplace and make of networking opportunities.
So now, first audience participation moment. We'd like to just get a sense of folks here in our audience and also if anyone prefers to enter into the app, we can do that as well. But we want to just get a show of hands of who here identifies as an introvert. Great so that's what we expect to see. So you're in the right place. This will be great content for you.
So without further ado, I'd like to turn it over to our panelists to introduce themselves and define what introversion means to them and how they identify with it. And we'll start here at the end of the table. Hi, everyone. My name is meta lucraft and I'm a Sr. Consultant at communications. I'm introversion to me was the light bulb moment when I was a middle career manager working at a large publisher.
I kept butting heads with senior management. I couldn't understand why was there something wrong with me? And then all of a sudden I heard this term introversion. I was that's me. There's nothing wrong with me. And the reason why I was butting heads with senior management, I was extremely introverted in an extremely extroverted cultural environment. So learning to deal with that and understanding what it meant to be an introvert and how to manage that with both managing upwards but managing teams has been revolutionary.
Hi, I'm Karen Farrell. I am head of scholarly communication at Indiana University libraries. Libraries probably have more than the one third of introverts. So it's a slightly different environment that I work in. And I would say I have probably a more complicated relationship with the term introvert because I think, you know, growing up I was considered shy, but I actually wouldn't really describe myself as shy.
I just Excel at one on 1 over group situations. I think some people occasionally think I'm a misanthrope. I actually like people. But what I firmly relate to and what I identify with is that interacting with people wears me down. It doesn't build me up, right? So I have to sort of learn to balance where I'm at with myself and how to navigate not just wearing myself out an event like this over three days and balance that with other ways to build myself up.
Hi, I'm going Schweitzer, silverchair's president. I used to BI Publisher for a really long time. Technology companies and publishers tend to get their fair share of introverts and their fair share of extroverted kind of very crazy people. So, you know, introversion to me means I spend a lot of time being introspective and thinking about how I show up. If people view me as being cold or emotionally reserved, or someone who's not contributing their fair share of energy to a conversation.
And of course, all the other things that we think about, how do we recharge ourselves? How much of ourselves can we put out there? How tired am I going to be tomorrow afternoon when all of this comes to a close? And it's been really interesting because think how I've approached my introversion has changed over the course of my career. Thank you.
So next question. So how has being an introvert shown up in your career specifically? And can you share an example of where it came up? It came into play and we'll start with Karen on this question. Oh Yeah. So we're starting with me. Um, so I think one of the things that I struggled with early on is was just contributing, right?
So you're sitting in large team environments, you're in a big group and they start asking questions and whoever has the loudest voice in the room sort of wins the day the decision gets made. And I'd go back and think, wait, but I have all these good ideas and now the decision's already done and what do I do? Um, and I think over the years I just had to start to learn regardless of what word I wanted to or, you know, apply to myself, that there had to be other ways to work better.
Right? um, one of the things that I started doing when I came to IU about a decade ago is our dean, um, our previous dean. Our dean at the time would have open door meetings, one on one meetings and thought, wait a minute, I could go to that one on one is perfect. And so I would just start going. And let me tell you, nobody goes to those, right?
It's like no one goes to these things. So you would get a 10 minute slot and you'd talk for 10 minutes and she'd be like, nobody else is coming. You're fine. Just keep talking. And it started to dawn on me that I had ways of working that worked. But there was still going to always be that challenge that if we're in a big group of people and you're going to make the decision in that moment, I'm probably going to struggle.
And to be honest, I still haven't. I don't know that I've solved that exact problem, though. Now, as a middle manager, I'm very conscious of that problem and try to make the groups that I lead work differently. Right so that other folks can be accommodated. Um, I think the, the other thing that's been on my mind just because we're here is the networking, the network. Look, none of us as introverts are ever going to be sort of the best networkers, right?
Like, this is always going to be a challenge. I will say strategically, what I have done is I have close friends who are extroverts and I rely on them. Yeah right. It's a great strategy. I rely on them to help me navigate. Um, I have a wonderful friend who will, you know, introduce me, make the point of contact that she knows sort of draws the two of us together, and then she'll drop right out of the conversation.
And then I'm left. Sort of. All I have to do is practice and have questions and love asking questions. So that part's fine. Um, so I do think there's, there's ways to sort of navigate around, um, as long as you're keeping in mind again that sort of balance of what's wearing you out and what's building you up.
Well, you're next. Oh, I'm next. OK so as I mentioned earlier, like, my introversion has changed throughout my career. So when I was really early in my career, learning publishing was a business analyst studying financial reports for medical journals, trying to figure out what going online would mean to their print advertising sales.
Right which is a perfect thing for an introvert to do sit and study data. And then you end up in these meetings, you start taking on more responsibility and you find yourself. So you spend more time listening that you can be a bit of a sponge, which is a really good thing. And then you had to find ways to learn how to effectively contribute.
One of the things I learned when I became middle management and managing more complexity was one on one. Conversations are great. Team meetings are really, really hard. So I learned I would try to send the most concise email I can of what I wanted to talk about or what I wanted to contribute ahead of time, and that was really valuable and it's something that I lean on now is kind of a leader, which was 140 person company.
We have eight other executives on our executive team. So when there's something really important, I'll send a note because I can be more expressive in writing than I can be in the room. And I've gotten great advice from my colleagues along the way that I have to share my thinking. So when I talk, it's often very, very short sentences. So I have to explain how I got from point A to point b, what I was factoring into my decision making processes and trying to bring folks along, because otherwise I'm going to show up into a room, sit there, say two things and probably try to walk right back out again, which doesn't help me or anybody else.
So yeah, I feel a lot of what's been said and I think, um, just, just leveraging that, that point about moving from being an autonomous manager of your own work to, to managing teams a lot. What for me was being put on the spot. I found being put on the spot very difficult, having to come up with answers immediately, either to respond to the team or respond to leaders. And again, the similar feedback that I would have was, well, you didn't contribute in that meeting.
You didn't have anything to say. Your face didn't give anything away. Facial expressions is something that was made aware of is know, introverts don't necessarily express what they're feeling on their face. So thinking consciously of finding strategies to say, I'd like to take some time to think about that. So, you know, proactively say I need some space to come back to you with, with a view on that and making sure I was being really explicit that I wanted that time to think or asking for agendas ahead of time, making sure that when had introverts on my team was taking that same approach.
So thinking about, um, giving them specific space to cover a topic that I knew that they would be comfortable talking about, giving them the space to prepare. Thinking about the pandemic situation is, you know, a lot of us move to the video screen, allowing them the space to turn off their cameras when they were finding that exhausting and recognizing that that wasn't them tuning out. They're just giving them the space to contribute in their own way.
And one thing I will say about that virtual technology is something we haven't talked about, and that was actually a great tool for introverts on the team to participate in other ways. So thinking about using alternative ways to help teams communicate, you know, they might not necessarily want to voice their opinions, but they might be happy to put that in the chat box. Chat boxes have been a really effective way of hearing what introverts on the team have wanted to communicate or using poll software using different ways of allowing those teams to get across what they wanted to, and then latterly in my job now is as a consultant.
So that involves a lot of going out and talking to people and networking. Networking is not something that I am good at or I enjoy, but finding alternative ways to do that. So setting out to plan ahead, to arrange to speak to people one on one so that a networking environment is not a scary environment, makes that more manageable. Great Thank you all.
So speaking of poll technology, I'm going to have everybody pull out their phones or computers. So we have a poll question, and it's open ended. So for everybody. And we'll ask our panelists the same question what is your introvert superpower? And then as you all are filling in your answers on the app, we'll have the our speakers answer the same question. So introverts have unique skills to both work and social situations.
What is your introvert superpower and how can introverts innate talents be leveraged in the workplace? So I think we are starting with will this time. Thank you. It's really interesting to think about introversion as a superpower, actually. Mean, one of the things that I think I do well as an introvert is, you know, as you move into more senior positions in the company or as your company is changing or growing, you'll find yourself in a lot of situations where you have to deal with complex, emotionally charged, challenging situations.
And you'll certainly find that when you become a leader of other leaders, that you sometimes have to have personal, difficult conversations with folks, say, around their performance management or making sure you have tight agreements about what one person agreed to do and maybe not have delivered. And one of I think my superpowers is an introvert is I can actually pull a lot of emotion out of those conversations.
So it isn't necessarily being dispassionate because you can still empathize with people, but it means that I'm coming in with less charge. I'm typically able to remain more calm, even though I might have a little bit of anxiety going into the conversation itself. Things tend to stay on a slightly more even keel, which I think helps both one on one interactions and groups kind of talk through difficulties.
I'm going to go with listening. I know it's already been raised, but again, as a consultant, my concern moving into a consultancy role from having been in large publishing organizations was how to approach negotiation. That wasn't a skill set. I knew as an introvert would be able to manage. So I was really pleased to identify that my listening skill was one that would help me in negotiation.
So being able to really spend the time preparing, preparing is another introvert skill. So using that skill to ask questions, prepare. And instead of racing to solutions to really understand the problems of the clients that I was speaking to was the superpower that I've enhanced. I think I'm going to go with maybe for a short answer. We'll call it flexibility.
I think introversion is one among many possibilities that, you know, as you sort of self-reflect on your own strengths and weaknesses, you can start to imagine the ways in which other people reflect completely different sets of strengths and weaknesses. Right? so I'm being really careful as a manager of people to not make assumptions about how they best work, to not presume that the way I work is going to also work well for them.
So I try to have really open and regular conversations with folks I work closely with about, OK, what like what are the ways in which we can work that's going to work best for you? Right? and a lot of that is about slowing down, which I'm hugely passionate about. I think it's Adrienne maree Brown said something about, you know, what you put your energy on is what grows, right? And so if, if it's important to you that the folks you work with can contribute their best work, then you have to be willing to sort of take the time to slow down and find out how to make that possible for them.
Thank you. So Stephanie is going to read some of the superpowers from the audience. Now reach the microphone. There we go. So some very common themes arising thinking, big picture focus. Observation is one that's come up a lot. Listening, empathy.
Attentive listening. Being attuned to others, feelings being analytical, imagination influencing on a smaller scale the ability to really dial into a task and tune out distractions, patience, the ability to see problems from unique, non-obvious perspectives. Organic deep relationships. Listening listening. Listening, listening, listening.
Um, data and pattern analysis. Um, being vulnerable, record keeping and being seen as a resource for others, being sensitive to others, unvoiced feelings and responses. Remembering every face I've ever met, asking questions methodically, problem solving, Uh, emotional awareness, and as an editor, being comfortable in quiet and solitude makes it easier to focus on my work.
Great, great answers. So with that, it's now we're going to open it up to audience questions. And certainly you're more than welcome to submit them in the app. I know we have some that were submitted prior to the session starting today, so but we'll open it up to the room here to see if anyone has any questions they want to ask.
OK, so if not, Stephanie, you want to do the app question. So I have a question. We we anticipated this. We anticipated this. Yes all right. What are some of the recommendations to be yourself within your skin while silently networking and growing toward a senior leadership role in an industry with rampant siloed cultures?
Oh, dear. I mean. I'm trying to figure out where to start with that. I mean, there's two things I think that I've come to believe quite strongly. And one of those is that there is. No such thing as silent networking. Right and there's all types of strategies you can have.
Having an extroverted friend taking the time to build deeper relationships outside of a large social context with folks in the industry who are very willing to introduce you to others. So one of the things I love about this community, having been in it for 20 years, is that this is a small and very supportive community and it is very easy to build relationships across people, and I think that's really important.
But I've also come to believe two other things. One is. To some degree. If you work very hard, your work will speak for itself. And you are going to have to find those opportunities where you have to exert some energy to approach someone or to try to make a persuasive argument or to be on a panel like this talking to folks. And I think an awful lot about a line from Hilary Mantel's wolf hall where Thomas Karamo always reminds himself to arrange his face before going into a situation.
And think about that a lot. So before I do anything, whether it's going to be the cocktail hour in the booth or going into a client meeting or a sales pitch, taking a moment and just arranging my face. And, you know, when it comes to things like silos and things, you may feel like you have to have outsized personal capital or presence to break down these divisions or to persuade a colleague.
But oftentimes, if you step back and you think more broadly about systems and processes of communication, you'll find someone who can help you and you don't always have to do it. And finding that person making the first ask can be difficult. But I think we're all capable of building up just a little bit of energy and a little bit of momentum to. Other answers.
OK I guess maybe to add to that, I'll just say and yeah, I mean, I agree with everything you said. the know, networking doesn't have to be about sitting at a table with 10 people you don't know and engaging them all in some sort of grand tale that you tell them that has them all rolling on the floor. Right like there's not that's not the only kind of networking. So sometimes, you know, if networking sort of in person in a situation like this is too much, you just resolve to follow up, right?
You go to sessions like this, you, you know, hear someone speak whose work you're interested in, and you follow up with them afterwards. You send them an email, you say, hey, we chat over Zoom or whatever. You know, there's other ways, I think to build those connections that don't have to be just sort of being a loud presence, essentially. So about a year into the pandemic, I wrote a post on LinkedIn, which was basically about how are people networking in this environment?
Because I personally did not want to go and join those virtual social events. After a day of sitting looking at a camera all day long. And it was amazing the response I had to that blog post. So many people contacted me and said, yes, yes, I really want to connect. So finding alternative ways to connect and network is network does not necessarily mean being in a room full of people that, you know like the reception environment yesterday I personally find so overwhelming.
That does not work for me. But finding ways to set up the opportunity to meet one on one with individuals even in that setting I think is the approach that can help you make headway in that finding. One one tip that I really liked that somebody shared with me was finding the topic that you have that you're really comfortable talking about and making sure that people are aware that you're prepared to have that conversation.
So you can then identify the other people in the room who really want to talk about that one topic and letting people know ahead of time that you'd like to talk to them about that. And the other tip that I had was maybe just engaging with speakers as a way of finding people you knew that you were going to have a conversation with. So, so identifying different ways to break down what can be incredibly unappealing as a networking, as an activity and finding different ways to do it, doing it online, using LinkedIn as a starting place to identify the people that you want to connect with when you're in the physical environment as well.
Right Thank you all. Other questions left for asking. OK Yep. I just. I was really interested by this question. What is your introversion superpower? As I thought about it myself, I thought, I have no idea how I would answer that.
I'm not sure I can think of as off the chart introvert. I'm not sure I could think of any positive advantage that it gives me that I've realized it. This going to sound like a post. I apologize. It's not meant that way. But as recently as yesterday, I had somebody say to me something that I hear a lot, which is how do you get so much work done?
They see me doing different things and they go, how do you do it? And I realized my introversion superpower is going back to my desk. It's honestly, that was at work. My happy place is at my desk in my office. It is not in the halls chatting with people. It's not in the watercooler and it's absolutely not in meetings.
And and so I do because my natural tendency is to go back to my desk and sit down and crank something out that that has been something of a superpower. But there is definitely a flip side to that. And that is that as a leader of a large organization, I need to be in the hallway chatting with people. I need to be in meetings. I need to be getting to know the people in my organization, especially the junior people in my organization.
And and so, you know, as I'm sure it is for all of us, the superpower has a flip side that I have to always be attending to and be. Any other live comments or questions? Yes OK. So I can see that. Often like are.
You possums that are introverts. So what do you recommend? Me those. Engage and. I mean, that sounds like an extrovert problem. So There's a few things, right?
Being at a technology company, we have several agile teams. Those agile teams have ceremonies that are forcing teams to come together on a regular basis. And I have to tell you, at Silverchair we have both a extroverts teams channel and an introverts team channel, and there are some very universal things such as communicating in GIFs or talking about pets or photos of cats or recipes, or actually engaging about a thorny technical issue.
And I think, guess what my advice is, is making sure that you have multiple ways for team members to both build interpersonal relationships with each other, trade gifts, talk about work problems, and also more formal settings to provide contribution. Mean, you know, I think one of the hardest things to do for an introvert, particularly in larger companies, is a massive company is finding folks with similar dispositions and interests.
So as a leader, as an employer, if you can find ways for your folks to do that, I think you're providing a. OK that was a much better answer. But just one thing. One thing to add to that is and it's been mentioned already, is that allyship and partnering up those extroverts with those introverts can be really powerful.
And there's some really nice examples of that that Julie mentioned already. But in Susan Cain's book, just really looking at those partnerships where you have an extrovert and an introvert, um, like the roosevelts, for example, that offers balance, you know, you have the louder voice who can represent what the quieter voice, but you know, the person who's going to give that input to the louder voice can be there's a partnership.
I think we had a comment over here. That's great. Thank you. Other comments or questions before we go to the app? Yes back there. Oh personal and.
One done anything like. So I think I caught that. But so were you saying tips for someone leading a team of introverts for manager?
So, yeah, I mean, that's a manager's job. I feel like I'm given all the crappy, like, pithy answers. And I'm like, if so, a manager who is going to do the work of a manager needs to be an advocate. That's sort of to me, that's sort of a core piece of being, being in, in management. Right um, and. So your team can be made up of all different kinds of people and your job, regardless of introvert, extrovert, ambivert introvert.
Yeah, it is. To do is to make sure that work is known and recognized. And if that's being done successfully, an introvert should be able to keep moving forward in some way that suits them, right? Because their work is becoming known throughout the organization. So for folks that I, um, that are work in a team with me right that I'm technically supervise I'm really conscious of the fact that it's my job to make sure people know how good their work is.
Um, is it of course, difficult to sort of self promote? Yeah and it can be really valuable to have a colleague or someone you trust to sort of run some of those things, past them to make sure don't, you know, for sort of a sanity check, essentially like, oh, am I boasting if I say this, are people going to be bored if I talk about this, those kind of checks can be really valuable. And you can a manager can be someone you know, if you have a solid relationship with them, can be someone that you talk about those things with.
But it doesn't have to be right. It can be someone else do. think some of this you can solve with organizational design and communication, right? So a silver chair. We have a Friday digest in that Friday digest, we have a kudos column where anyone can provide written recognition for any of their colleagues, regardless of the size of their contribution.
Whether it was a small thing like, Thanks for walking me back from that ledge in a stressful meeting, or Thank you for working 48 hours straight to put out this fire. And that's a really good mechanism. And I think if you are engaged with your other managers and leaders within the company, you should be talking about both informal and formal ways to recognize folks.
And yes, some of it is our job to make sure our people are getting credit. But like one of the things that I don't think organizations do enough is that if you have a up and coming manager, you have a junior contributor, invite them into the management room, bring them into an executive session, let them present their work, let them get upgrades from other leaders, and managers within the company, because part of your job is exposing both their work and them to other folks who can also provide them valuable advice, something I'd recommend.
Yeah one other thing well mentioned earlier that I recognize in myself when I've BIM manager is I don't always add the context. I just take for granted that everybody understands the information around what I'm talking about, which means you miss some of those really key points to really get across what that great work is that that team is doing. So proactively recognizing that that is a limitation of mine and making the effort to add all of that context back in is what helps really profile the work of that team.
So I think there are things that being consciously aware that we do as an introvert and proactively taking steps to make sure that we minimize that can help with that as well. Think there was a comment over here. Well, I was going to ask. I love this idea of aligning extroverts and introverts, and I kind of lost myself here as an extrovert. I'm curious, like, what can I do?
I love that idea. Like, what other things can I do in order to be more attuned to or supportive of the introverts around? I love the point that Julie made earlier of doing the introductions, because that is the thing, you know, in a big, big room of people that can be so intimidating for an introvert. So actually making that step to make those 1 to 1 conversation possible is, is really valuable.
And the other thing that we've talked about is that that meeting setting where, you know, there are extroverts and introverts, if you recognize that a colleague is an introvert, but then they're not going to make their point of view heard having had that one on one conversation with them first so you understand their opinion and you can help them voice that opinion in the meeting. Make sure that there's space for that opinion to be heard is really powerful.
I'm going to give praise to Stephanie. My colleague is one of my biggest allies within the company because she will just do very simple things like. Hey, guys, we've been talking for 15 minutes. Will's been awfully quiet. Will, what do you think? Or will, when we were talking about this earlier, you made this point.
I think it would be really great for you to share. And I think it does require some coordination, but it is actually helpful to have allies who will draw you out, who will provide a bit of encouragement, or if you need someone essentially to talk through the stress and anxiety of things going into meetings, that can be really helpful. So I spent a lot of time talking with a few of my peers before I go into a board meeting, because how I show up in those board meetings, the confidence that relay the stress that may be on my face sends really strong signals to stakeholders that only agree with you for short periods of time.
So having someone that you can lean on, having someone to ask you to express your thoughts. Having someone to remind you or to provide a break in the conversation for you to jump in can be really helpful. Yeah I mean, I'm only on this panel because I've an extroverted friend who was like, oh, I know the perfect person. Right so, yeah, I mean, having, having allies, having partners, having friends around who have different strengths is always valuable.
The current aversion hind coercion. Go to the app. We do have a bunch of questions in the app. One is, can you speak to the overlap between introversion and imposter syndrome? Oh we talked about this a little bit in advance. Yeah you. To some degree.
This is actually a great audience question since we more than half of us were introverts in the room, how many of us have actually felt we had imposter syndrome at some point? Because I know for vast swaths of my career, I felt like an imposter, right? And some of that I think some of imposter syndrome is being comfortable in your own skin, feeling that your stuff, that you can communicate it effectively.
And I think it's also some degree we doubt our own merits or value, and that's tough to get over and don't know necessarily if imposter syndrome and introversion are, you know, directly linked. But I know actually a lot of extroverts that feel imposter syndrome too, but we just have to cope with it in very different ways. There was an advice there.
I'm sorry. But yeah, I mean, I feel like that's a completely that's a whole separate panel right there. I don't think I've got anything smarter now. I guess I would say this. I come from a family of crazy extroverts, and some of the advice my grandfather was in the Navy for a really long time in his retirement. He belonged to, like, every singing and dancing and card group on the face of the Earth.
And when he would see me struggling, particularly in high school or in college in my first job interviews and things, he would tell me, it's not as serious as you think and just get on with it. Right? and my advice is, if you feel like you're struggling with imposter syndrome, a bit of it's in your head. And the idea is that contributes. You have likely have a lot of value and merit to your colleagues.
So take a step. Good advice. Thank you. Yeah, please. And really good advice. That's great advice.
Don't know how many librarians are in the audience, particularly ones who are in tenure places. But we have such an introversion problem in librarianship. That problem, it's not actually it works pretty well because there are so many introverts, but occasionally it can cause us some problems, including in tenure issues, which is a place that you have to be really, really self promoting. And and so this it does become a real challenge then in which we do things like hold workshops and sort of grade each other's work and sort of force people to really work on that self promotion angle because you have to, right?
I mean, that's sort of what the tenure process is, is being able to promote your own work in a really. Yeah, really significantly so. Fortunately, I guess being in that environment where there are so many introverts, we've worked in some extra steps to make sure we're helping folks through that process. Other comments from the audience.
It will go back to the app. Any tips for handling performance, anxiety and meetings? The ability to collect thoughts on the spot and articulate thoughts. But that one think it is so comes down to preparing ahead of time, asking for agendas, asking for a specific opportunity to talk about the particular point that you want to get across.
So again, you've had a chance to think it through to prepare what you want to say, maybe asking if you can share some of those points in writing, because I think all of us will recognize we are often better on paper. So having a chance to think, think it through or share it in other ways that reactivity was, you know, reacting to on the spot questions was a real problem for me.
And I was I was finding that was holding me back in my career because I couldn't do it. So practicing those responses that you can give so you don't have to give the answer is really helpful. Just just practicing. You know, I recognize that this is something that you want more information about. Can I get back to you?
I want to think it through being really transparent about that. That's something that you need the time to think about. Similar bit of advice like it is. OK in the room, in a meeting, in a conversation to say, hold on for just one minute. I need to think this through. I do that an awful lot. And the other thing is generally, and this may be a particularly American thing, we're uncomfortable with silence, right?
You're in a room and there's silence for 45 seconds. It can be wholly terrifying. But if you embrace the silence for just a little bit, you can find yourself. You're providing yourself a window to make a contribution. Yeah, I mean, I feel like I'm just sort of repeating, but I think right there's the two pieces. One is that it's very much OK to ask for information in advance. If you can tell from like a meeting request that there's possibly the chance that you're going to need to contribute something.
It's OK to say, you know, this seems this seems like something where we're going to have an in-depth discussion or you're going to want some input or decisions. What can you give me in advance so that I'm prepared for this? And depending on the level of sort of contribution required in that meeting, it's also OK to say, you know, this is really important and I want to take some time to digest and can I get back to you by x?
Right? like it can be all right in many situations. Probably not all of them to push back a little. Right and sometimes. It it isn't working that way because people are just making assumptions, right? So if you push back, they are often likely to say, Oh yeah, didn't occur to me that maybe we should, you know, take a pause for 24 hours and everyone's going to reconvene because that's not how they work, right?
So it just takes someone being willing to sort of point it out to them. And then the practice thing. Yeah I mean, I think the, you know, the longer you're in a particular career, you start to have some sort of answers and some core information that's more sort of easily accessible to your brain and mouth in a given moment. And it just takes time and practice.
I think just one thing to add to that is I found it really helpful to tell the extroverts in those teams who wanted those responses that this is why I'm asking for this time in advance, or I'm asking you to share this in advance because you want me to help give you my best work. I will need that time to be able to give you my thoughts and my answers is to in advance what you're asking me to prepare.
Yeah and the other thing you can do is actually lay out ground rules for the meeting. So if you're in a meeting and you want an outcome to be a decision, how are you going to make that decision? So who is making the decision? What is the method that we are going to reach consensus or this is a consensus decision. Are we going to vote what the process is actually going to be?
And it seems a little awkward at first, but it can be really helpful in the room. Yeah, there's a lot of meeting facilitation that I think can be really valuable for a lot of these things. Just in thinking through how folks are interacting, going to interact, who gets the opportunity to speak, how people can contribute and think. A lot of those basics, I agree, can feel awkward at first, but if you get into a habit, you know, if you say come into a new committee and you have an opportunity to chair a committee setting that stuff up at the start it once you start doing it, it feels pretty easy.
Right Thank you all. So other comments from the audience. Yes it's OK. I we?
And well, Yeah. So too much to ask for something that really means more. I agree with that 100% Other other thoughts from the audience before we go back to the app.
All right. Another question how do you manage expectations for extroverted direct reports when you're an introvert? Looking at half of my team that's in the room. Uh, so one of the strengths of being an introvert is we've talked about you can be a good listener. You can develop really deep one on one relationships with folks.
And I think it can be a really helpful exercise at the start of a relationship or at a reset point with your direct reports to talk about how you operate. What are your ways of working? You know, telling folks that you don't show your emotions on your face, but you take things seriously, that lengthy conversations can be draining for you, but you are happy to follow up by email or by text. And I think it's actually just sharing what works for you, what your preferences are asking them, what their preferences are, how they want to work, and kind of negotiating a relationship that works for both of you and what you hope is over the course of time that you guys just know how to approach one another.
And again, something that feels awkward at first, but. You'll find a groove. Their audience questions. All right. We've got more on that. All right. If you're in an environment with no peers or allies that isn't welcoming toward introverts, how can you encourage yourself to participate and advocate for yourself?
I think that's a really important one. I asked him again, the LinkedIn community about what they saw as real, real problems. And one point that really saddened me was they felt that being an introvert had really held them back in their career because they weren't prepared to go and have conversations. I mean, Karen identified that there was the one to 1 environment where you could go and do that, and that's really powerful.
But if you don't know how to do that, that that potentially closes doors to you. So I think, um, it's really key to think about are there advocates that you can work with, you know, if that's identifying a peer who you can get, get some of that allyship from or if it's about having more senior people who can mentor you and actually help to support that career progression. I think there's ways that you need to identify how how you can manage being an introvert without holding holding you back.
Yeah mean think the mentoring piece. Right? so I'm sort of imagining in this scenario it's sort of sad, right? Like someone who doesn't feel like there's anyone locally that they can sort of rely on to help them. And I think that's when you turn to. You do actually more officially turn to groups like this, you know, and you do an actual formal mentorship in which you can be paired with someone who's going to be able to help you figure out how to get further in your career.
Yeah, it can be a very difficult thing. But share how those circumstances make you feel, that you feel like you have contributions to make, but you aren't able to make them. And to take this to an extreme, I think get into a place where you begin thinking about fit. And fit is really important in thinking about your career, your career trajectory, wanting to have know, all of us want to feel happy at work.
All of us want to feel valued at work. And sometimes we can find ourselves in situations where our fit in terms of communication, style or dynamic or approach isn't a good fit. And sometimes it's OK to recognize that. And then you have a really tough decision to make. Can you make it work, or should you find somewhere else where you may be a better fit? And that takes some soul searching.
And I know it's going to be the hardest thing ever for any of us introverts to then say, OK, if this isn't a good fit, now what do I go do? Because I'm going to have to network, I'm going to have to promote and put myself out there. But it is so important, I think, to our value, our sense of self, to belong at work and feel like you can make good, valuable contributions. So don't be afraid to call it, I guess, is what I'm saying.
Shall did I see your hand? Yes well, I just want to plug the membership program. Great program. We have to focus every year. If you can't get mentorship within your organization, that's what. Yes, over here.
Say for myself. So I'm going to put the. Thank you. Years and years.
It's you know. Yeah and the great advice someone, someone gave about asking questions is always really helpful.
But the other part is it can often be easier to build a relationship talking about non-work things. So I reminded myself of very long time ago when I was dating, I would read slate articles that reviewed kind of the latest hit T.V shows, so I'd have something to talk about. But I find myself doing that when I roll into prospecting meetings where I'm meeting with a potential client, where either I'm researching them or their business, or I'm making sure that I've at least read the top 10 headlines of the day so that you have something that is neutral, safe and top of mind just to get a.
I think when you're talking about within your organization to I'd also go back to of being willing to talk to folks work closely with about what will help you produce your best work. Right because I think that framing, even if you're working with someone with whom I don't know, maybe you don't want to talk about being an introvert or you don't want to talk about something that feels personal to you, that's fine.
But if you have ideas about what can help you produce your best work, anyone, anyone you work with who wants their work to succeed is going to be interested in hearing what you have to say about that. Right? may not get you everything you're hoping for, but they should be interested in hearing that just for their own sort of their own work as well. Yeah, I think at the end of the day, we all have to do things that we don't like doing from time to time.
And yeah, if that is putting yourself in those uncomfortable networking environments because that helps you move a conversation along. Yeah, absolutely. Just occasionally we just have to grit our teeth and get through it. And then give yourself the space afterwards that you need to recover from it. I think we have time for one more question before our closing question, which is a fun one.
OK I'm going to kind of combine two because I think they're a little related. This one's very actionable as you meet people here at SSP in other places, how do you get up the nerve to connect with people you've met, to ask for their contact information and establish connections when you have a difficult time with self-promotion and worry that others aren't interested in connecting. Add on.
LinkedIn has been mentioned a couple of times. Are there other kind of channels for networking that you've found to be very effective? I mentioned LinkedIn because I think it is really valuable. And as I've been meeting people here, I've been adding them on LinkedIn because I know even if I haven't had a chance to have those deep conversations here, I can then use that as a chance to to, to continue a discussion with them.
So I think it works really well. I know obviously there is the Whova app. And there are ways that you can connect with people that you're meeting here. But I would say LinkedIn is an ongoing channel of great communication for me. Yeah mean you don't again think it's OK if you're not able to sort of put yourself out there a lot on the spot.
Right there's ways I think to follow up afterwards maybe someone did a poster that you find really interesting, you know, send out, reach them, reach out to them afterwards, send them an email, arrange to chat with them, whatever. Um, so I think especially fortunately these days, right, with all the different sort of online ways that we can connect, you don't have to rely on don't sharing a, sharing a pinot noir in the welcome reception.
Right I think there's some other strategies that maybe don't feel as effective because we're so trained to think of what networking looks like but think can really be valuable and lead to probably the kinds of close connections that will help you in your career anyway. So I'm going to take us to our closing question, which is we were meeting in advance we thought was a really fun one. So what is the worst advice that you got in your career as an introvert?
Let me. Whoever wants to go first. We don't have an order on this one. I'm going to call out open plan working. Isn't it? Isn't it great for introverts? Make sure as an introvert you find your space to go and get the deep creative work that you need to do. Done and don't feel that, you know, if you are forced as part of your work culture to be in that open plan environment, make it clear that that's not where you're going to get that deep creative work done and allow yourself the space that hopefully most organizations have now recognized that hybrid working can be beneficial for everyone.
I think mine is sort of pegging off the back of what you were saying before about your family as just this idea that you should push through and do it anyway. Right and do we all have to some degree here or there? Yes, probably. We are all are going to do things we don't like as well. But I think part of it is being locked in by our own sort of imagination, which thinks networking has to look a certain way.
Connecting has to look a certain way. And that there are other ways to build those kinds of connections that, you know, don't have to play to your weaknesses all the time. Right? if that's not where your skill set is. Get on a committee doing work that you're really interested in and build connections with people that way. Right I mean, there's, there's, there's like other strategies besides welcome receptions, I think.
The worst advice I ever got was just will talk louder. Just be more dynamic and like, you know, you then find yourself being like a hack and you come off as being inauthentic and that potentially is worse. I mean, that definitely leads to feelings of imposter syndrome. Some of it is actually just being comfortable with your communication style. I'm a soft spoken guy and that's just who I am.
And if I try to be a showman or a carnival barker, it isn't going to work. I'm not going to be persuasive. I'm probably going to seem less credible in a sales situation or something like that. So it is just being comfortable and it's thinking about how you communicate, how you want to design a presentation. Do you want to send a note in advance?
It's reminding yourself that you have strengths and you don't have to be the gregarious showman. You can be just as successful. Excellent well, Thank you so much to our panelists. Thanks, everybody, for the amazing questions and discussion. I think this is super valuable. So
Segment:0 .
Hello, everybody. So we're going to go ahead and get started. So thank you all so much for coming today. So my name is Julie Nash and I'm senior director of partnership development with j. And j editorial within WileyPLUS partner solutions. And so I'll be moderating our session here today in this session has taken a little a bunch of twists and turns over the years.
It was first proposed back in 2019 to be part of the 2020 program, but unfortunately was a casualty of the pandemic. And then it's popped around a couple times as various ideas and webinars and such. So we're so happy to have the session. Introverted leader career development and networking advice for the quiet among us here on our stage today. And I'm very happy to be joined by 3 excellent panelists and they'll all introduce themselves here in a minute.
And our session style today is going to be a Q&A session. So we have a number of set questions that will handle first, but then we're going to kick it all out to you for various audience questions. And certainly you can post anything in the app. And Stephanie is going to be helping us with the app questions as well as some audience engagement moments that we have throughout the program today. So before we get started, I'd like to just set the scene a little bit about the topic that we're going to talk about today.
So while extroverts tend to be more seen and more heard, research shows that at least a third of our coworkers are introverts. Members of our teams are the ones that prefer listening to speaking, who innovate and create, but dislike self-promotion, who favor working on their own rather than working in teams. Many amazing achievements have come from self self-described introverts like Rosa Parks and Bill Gates.
In this session, we'll discuss how introverts can advocate for themselves in the workplace, making career aspiration, aspirations and contributions known. And we hear from our panelists who are also self-described introverts about the tips that they have for everyone here on how to navigate the workplace and make of networking opportunities.
So now, first audience participation moment. We'd like to just get a sense of folks here in our audience and also if anyone prefers to enter into the app, we can do that as well. But we want to just get a show of hands of who here identifies as an introvert. Great so that's what we expect to see. So you're in the right place. This will be great content for you.
So without further ado, I'd like to turn it over to our panelists to introduce themselves and define what introversion means to them and how they identify with it. And we'll start here at the end of the table. Hi, everyone. My name is meta lucraft and I'm a Sr. Consultant at communications. I'm introversion to me was the light bulb moment when I was a middle career manager working at a large publisher.
I kept butting heads with senior management. I couldn't understand why was there something wrong with me? And then all of a sudden I heard this term introversion. I was that's me. There's nothing wrong with me. And the reason why I was butting heads with senior management, I was extremely introverted in an extremely extroverted cultural environment. So learning to deal with that and understanding what it meant to be an introvert and how to manage that with both managing upwards but managing teams has been revolutionary.
Hi, I'm Karen Farrell. I am head of scholarly communication at Indiana University libraries. Libraries probably have more than the one third of introverts. So it's a slightly different environment that I work in. And I would say I have probably a more complicated relationship with the term introvert because I think, you know, growing up I was considered shy, but I actually wouldn't really describe myself as shy.
I just Excel at one on 1 over group situations. I think some people occasionally think I'm a misanthrope. I actually like people. But what I firmly relate to and what I identify with is that interacting with people wears me down. It doesn't build me up, right? So I have to sort of learn to balance where I'm at with myself and how to navigate not just wearing myself out an event like this over three days and balance that with other ways to build myself up.
Hi, I'm going Schweitzer, silverchair's president. I used to BI Publisher for a really long time. Technology companies and publishers tend to get their fair share of introverts and their fair share of extroverted kind of very crazy people. So, you know, introversion to me means I spend a lot of time being introspective and thinking about how I show up. If people view me as being cold or emotionally reserved, or someone who's not contributing their fair share of energy to a conversation.
And of course, all the other things that we think about, how do we recharge ourselves? How much of ourselves can we put out there? How tired am I going to be tomorrow afternoon when all of this comes to a close? And it's been really interesting because think how I've approached my introversion has changed over the course of my career. Thank you.
So next question. So how has being an introvert shown up in your career specifically? And can you share an example of where it came up? It came into play and we'll start with Karen on this question. Oh Yeah. So we're starting with me. Um, so I think one of the things that I struggled with early on is was just contributing, right?
So you're sitting in large team environments, you're in a big group and they start asking questions and whoever has the loudest voice in the room sort of wins the day the decision gets made. And I'd go back and think, wait, but I have all these good ideas and now the decision's already done and what do I do? Um, and I think over the years I just had to start to learn regardless of what word I wanted to or, you know, apply to myself, that there had to be other ways to work better.
Right? um, one of the things that I started doing when I came to IU about a decade ago is our dean, um, our previous dean. Our dean at the time would have open door meetings, one on one meetings and thought, wait a minute, I could go to that one on one is perfect. And so I would just start going. And let me tell you, nobody goes to those, right?
It's like no one goes to these things. So you would get a 10 minute slot and you'd talk for 10 minutes and she'd be like, nobody else is coming. You're fine. Just keep talking. And it started to dawn on me that I had ways of working that worked. But there was still going to always be that challenge that if we're in a big group of people and you're going to make the decision in that moment, I'm probably going to struggle.
And to be honest, I still haven't. I don't know that I've solved that exact problem, though. Now, as a middle manager, I'm very conscious of that problem and try to make the groups that I lead work differently. Right so that other folks can be accommodated. Um, I think the, the other thing that's been on my mind just because we're here is the networking, the network. Look, none of us as introverts are ever going to be sort of the best networkers, right?
Like, this is always going to be a challenge. I will say strategically, what I have done is I have close friends who are extroverts and I rely on them. Yeah right. It's a great strategy. I rely on them to help me navigate. Um, I have a wonderful friend who will, you know, introduce me, make the point of contact that she knows sort of draws the two of us together, and then she'll drop right out of the conversation.
And then I'm left. Sort of. All I have to do is practice and have questions and love asking questions. So that part's fine. Um, so I do think there's, there's ways to sort of navigate around, um, as long as you're keeping in mind again that sort of balance of what's wearing you out and what's building you up.
Well, you're next. Oh, I'm next. OK so as I mentioned earlier, like, my introversion has changed throughout my career. So when I was really early in my career, learning publishing was a business analyst studying financial reports for medical journals, trying to figure out what going online would mean to their print advertising sales.
Right which is a perfect thing for an introvert to do sit and study data. And then you end up in these meetings, you start taking on more responsibility and you find yourself. So you spend more time listening that you can be a bit of a sponge, which is a really good thing. And then you had to find ways to learn how to effectively contribute.
One of the things I learned when I became middle management and managing more complexity was one on one. Conversations are great. Team meetings are really, really hard. So I learned I would try to send the most concise email I can of what I wanted to talk about or what I wanted to contribute ahead of time, and that was really valuable and it's something that I lean on now is kind of a leader, which was 140 person company.
We have eight other executives on our executive team. So when there's something really important, I'll send a note because I can be more expressive in writing than I can be in the room. And I've gotten great advice from my colleagues along the way that I have to share my thinking. So when I talk, it's often very, very short sentences. So I have to explain how I got from point A to point b, what I was factoring into my decision making processes and trying to bring folks along, because otherwise I'm going to show up into a room, sit there, say two things and probably try to walk right back out again, which doesn't help me or anybody else.
So yeah, I feel a lot of what's been said and I think, um, just, just leveraging that, that point about moving from being an autonomous manager of your own work to, to managing teams a lot. What for me was being put on the spot. I found being put on the spot very difficult, having to come up with answers immediately, either to respond to the team or respond to leaders. And again, the similar feedback that I would have was, well, you didn't contribute in that meeting.
You didn't have anything to say. Your face didn't give anything away. Facial expressions is something that was made aware of is know, introverts don't necessarily express what they're feeling on their face. So thinking consciously of finding strategies to say, I'd like to take some time to think about that. So, you know, proactively say I need some space to come back to you with, with a view on that and making sure I was being really explicit that I wanted that time to think or asking for agendas ahead of time, making sure that when had introverts on my team was taking that same approach.
So thinking about, um, giving them specific space to cover a topic that I knew that they would be comfortable talking about, giving them the space to prepare. Thinking about the pandemic situation is, you know, a lot of us move to the video screen, allowing them the space to turn off their cameras when they were finding that exhausting and recognizing that that wasn't them tuning out. They're just giving them the space to contribute in their own way.
And one thing I will say about that virtual technology is something we haven't talked about, and that was actually a great tool for introverts on the team to participate in other ways. So thinking about using alternative ways to help teams communicate, you know, they might not necessarily want to voice their opinions, but they might be happy to put that in the chat box. Chat boxes have been a really effective way of hearing what introverts on the team have wanted to communicate or using poll software using different ways of allowing those teams to get across what they wanted to, and then latterly in my job now is as a consultant.
So that involves a lot of going out and talking to people and networking. Networking is not something that I am good at or I enjoy, but finding alternative ways to do that. So setting out to plan ahead, to arrange to speak to people one on one so that a networking environment is not a scary environment, makes that more manageable. Great Thank you all.
So speaking of poll technology, I'm going to have everybody pull out their phones or computers. So we have a poll question, and it's open ended. So for everybody. And we'll ask our panelists the same question what is your introvert superpower? And then as you all are filling in your answers on the app, we'll have the our speakers answer the same question. So introverts have unique skills to both work and social situations.
What is your introvert superpower and how can introverts innate talents be leveraged in the workplace? So I think we are starting with will this time. Thank you. It's really interesting to think about introversion as a superpower, actually. Mean, one of the things that I think I do well as an introvert is, you know, as you move into more senior positions in the company or as your company is changing or growing, you'll find yourself in a lot of situations where you have to deal with complex, emotionally charged, challenging situations.
And you'll certainly find that when you become a leader of other leaders, that you sometimes have to have personal, difficult conversations with folks, say, around their performance management or making sure you have tight agreements about what one person agreed to do and maybe not have delivered. And one of I think my superpowers is an introvert is I can actually pull a lot of emotion out of those conversations.
So it isn't necessarily being dispassionate because you can still empathize with people, but it means that I'm coming in with less charge. I'm typically able to remain more calm, even though I might have a little bit of anxiety going into the conversation itself. Things tend to stay on a slightly more even keel, which I think helps both one on one interactions and groups kind of talk through difficulties.
I'm going to go with listening. I know it's already been raised, but again, as a consultant, my concern moving into a consultancy role from having been in large publishing organizations was how to approach negotiation. That wasn't a skill set. I knew as an introvert would be able to manage. So I was really pleased to identify that my listening skill was one that would help me in negotiation.
So being able to really spend the time preparing, preparing is another introvert skill. So using that skill to ask questions, prepare. And instead of racing to solutions to really understand the problems of the clients that I was speaking to was the superpower that I've enhanced. I think I'm going to go with maybe for a short answer. We'll call it flexibility.
I think introversion is one among many possibilities that, you know, as you sort of self-reflect on your own strengths and weaknesses, you can start to imagine the ways in which other people reflect completely different sets of strengths and weaknesses. Right? so I'm being really careful as a manager of people to not make assumptions about how they best work, to not presume that the way I work is going to also work well for them.
So I try to have really open and regular conversations with folks I work closely with about, OK, what like what are the ways in which we can work that's going to work best for you? Right? and a lot of that is about slowing down, which I'm hugely passionate about. I think it's Adrienne maree Brown said something about, you know, what you put your energy on is what grows, right? And so if, if it's important to you that the folks you work with can contribute their best work, then you have to be willing to sort of take the time to slow down and find out how to make that possible for them.
Thank you. So Stephanie is going to read some of the superpowers from the audience. Now reach the microphone. There we go. So some very common themes arising thinking, big picture focus. Observation is one that's come up a lot. Listening, empathy.
Attentive listening. Being attuned to others, feelings being analytical, imagination influencing on a smaller scale the ability to really dial into a task and tune out distractions, patience, the ability to see problems from unique, non-obvious perspectives. Organic deep relationships. Listening listening. Listening, listening, listening.
Um, data and pattern analysis. Um, being vulnerable, record keeping and being seen as a resource for others, being sensitive to others, unvoiced feelings and responses. Remembering every face I've ever met, asking questions methodically, problem solving, Uh, emotional awareness, and as an editor, being comfortable in quiet and solitude makes it easier to focus on my work.
Great, great answers. So with that, it's now we're going to open it up to audience questions. And certainly you're more than welcome to submit them in the app. I know we have some that were submitted prior to the session starting today, so but we'll open it up to the room here to see if anyone has any questions they want to ask.
OK, so if not, Stephanie, you want to do the app question. So I have a question. We we anticipated this. We anticipated this. Yes all right. What are some of the recommendations to be yourself within your skin while silently networking and growing toward a senior leadership role in an industry with rampant siloed cultures?
Oh, dear. I mean. I'm trying to figure out where to start with that. I mean, there's two things I think that I've come to believe quite strongly. And one of those is that there is. No such thing as silent networking. Right and there's all types of strategies you can have.
Having an extroverted friend taking the time to build deeper relationships outside of a large social context with folks in the industry who are very willing to introduce you to others. So one of the things I love about this community, having been in it for 20 years, is that this is a small and very supportive community and it is very easy to build relationships across people, and I think that's really important.
But I've also come to believe two other things. One is. To some degree. If you work very hard, your work will speak for itself. And you are going to have to find those opportunities where you have to exert some energy to approach someone or to try to make a persuasive argument or to be on a panel like this talking to folks. And I think an awful lot about a line from Hilary Mantel's wolf hall where Thomas Karamo always reminds himself to arrange his face before going into a situation.
And think about that a lot. So before I do anything, whether it's going to be the cocktail hour in the booth or going into a client meeting or a sales pitch, taking a moment and just arranging my face. And, you know, when it comes to things like silos and things, you may feel like you have to have outsized personal capital or presence to break down these divisions or to persuade a colleague.
But oftentimes, if you step back and you think more broadly about systems and processes of communication, you'll find someone who can help you and you don't always have to do it. And finding that person making the first ask can be difficult. But I think we're all capable of building up just a little bit of energy and a little bit of momentum to. Other answers.
OK I guess maybe to add to that, I'll just say and yeah, I mean, I agree with everything you said. the know, networking doesn't have to be about sitting at a table with 10 people you don't know and engaging them all in some sort of grand tale that you tell them that has them all rolling on the floor. Right like there's not that's not the only kind of networking. So sometimes, you know, if networking sort of in person in a situation like this is too much, you just resolve to follow up, right?
You go to sessions like this, you, you know, hear someone speak whose work you're interested in, and you follow up with them afterwards. You send them an email, you say, hey, we chat over Zoom or whatever. You know, there's other ways, I think to build those connections that don't have to be just sort of being a loud presence, essentially. So about a year into the pandemic, I wrote a post on LinkedIn, which was basically about how are people networking in this environment?
Because I personally did not want to go and join those virtual social events. After a day of sitting looking at a camera all day long. And it was amazing the response I had to that blog post. So many people contacted me and said, yes, yes, I really want to connect. So finding alternative ways to connect and network is network does not necessarily mean being in a room full of people that, you know like the reception environment yesterday I personally find so overwhelming.
That does not work for me. But finding ways to set up the opportunity to meet one on one with individuals even in that setting I think is the approach that can help you make headway in that finding. One one tip that I really liked that somebody shared with me was finding the topic that you have that you're really comfortable talking about and making sure that people are aware that you're prepared to have that conversation.
So you can then identify the other people in the room who really want to talk about that one topic and letting people know ahead of time that you'd like to talk to them about that. And the other tip that I had was maybe just engaging with speakers as a way of finding people you knew that you were going to have a conversation with. So, so identifying different ways to break down what can be incredibly unappealing as a networking, as an activity and finding different ways to do it, doing it online, using LinkedIn as a starting place to identify the people that you want to connect with when you're in the physical environment as well.
Right Thank you all. Other questions left for asking. OK Yep. I just. I was really interested by this question. What is your introversion superpower? As I thought about it myself, I thought, I have no idea how I would answer that.
I'm not sure I can think of as off the chart introvert. I'm not sure I could think of any positive advantage that it gives me that I've realized it. This going to sound like a post. I apologize. It's not meant that way. But as recently as yesterday, I had somebody say to me something that I hear a lot, which is how do you get so much work done?
They see me doing different things and they go, how do you do it? And I realized my introversion superpower is going back to my desk. It's honestly, that was at work. My happy place is at my desk in my office. It is not in the halls chatting with people. It's not in the watercooler and it's absolutely not in meetings.
And and so I do because my natural tendency is to go back to my desk and sit down and crank something out that that has been something of a superpower. But there is definitely a flip side to that. And that is that as a leader of a large organization, I need to be in the hallway chatting with people. I need to be in meetings. I need to be getting to know the people in my organization, especially the junior people in my organization.
And and so, you know, as I'm sure it is for all of us, the superpower has a flip side that I have to always be attending to and be. Any other live comments or questions? Yes OK. So I can see that. Often like are.
You possums that are introverts. So what do you recommend? Me those. Engage and. I mean, that sounds like an extrovert problem. So There's a few things, right?
Being at a technology company, we have several agile teams. Those agile teams have ceremonies that are forcing teams to come together on a regular basis. And I have to tell you, at Silverchair we have both a extroverts teams channel and an introverts team channel, and there are some very universal things such as communicating in GIFs or talking about pets or photos of cats or recipes, or actually engaging about a thorny technical issue.
And I think, guess what my advice is, is making sure that you have multiple ways for team members to both build interpersonal relationships with each other, trade gifts, talk about work problems, and also more formal settings to provide contribution. Mean, you know, I think one of the hardest things to do for an introvert, particularly in larger companies, is a massive company is finding folks with similar dispositions and interests.
So as a leader, as an employer, if you can find ways for your folks to do that, I think you're providing a. OK that was a much better answer. But just one thing. One thing to add to that is and it's been mentioned already, is that allyship and partnering up those extroverts with those introverts can be really powerful.
And there's some really nice examples of that that Julie mentioned already. But in Susan Cain's book, just really looking at those partnerships where you have an extrovert and an introvert, um, like the roosevelts, for example, that offers balance, you know, you have the louder voice who can represent what the quieter voice, but you know, the person who's going to give that input to the louder voice can be there's a partnership.
I think we had a comment over here. That's great. Thank you. Other comments or questions before we go to the app? Yes back there. Oh personal and.
One done anything like. So I think I caught that. But so were you saying tips for someone leading a team of introverts for manager?
So, yeah, I mean, that's a manager's job. I feel like I'm given all the crappy, like, pithy answers. And I'm like, if so, a manager who is going to do the work of a manager needs to be an advocate. That's sort of to me, that's sort of a core piece of being, being in, in management. Right um, and. So your team can be made up of all different kinds of people and your job, regardless of introvert, extrovert, ambivert introvert.
Yeah, it is. To do is to make sure that work is known and recognized. And if that's being done successfully, an introvert should be able to keep moving forward in some way that suits them, right? Because their work is becoming known throughout the organization. So for folks that I, um, that are work in a team with me right that I'm technically supervise I'm really conscious of the fact that it's my job to make sure people know how good their work is.
Um, is it of course, difficult to sort of self promote? Yeah and it can be really valuable to have a colleague or someone you trust to sort of run some of those things, past them to make sure don't, you know, for sort of a sanity check, essentially like, oh, am I boasting if I say this, are people going to be bored if I talk about this, those kind of checks can be really valuable. And you can a manager can be someone you know, if you have a solid relationship with them, can be someone that you talk about those things with.
But it doesn't have to be right. It can be someone else do. think some of this you can solve with organizational design and communication, right? So a silver chair. We have a Friday digest in that Friday digest, we have a kudos column where anyone can provide written recognition for any of their colleagues, regardless of the size of their contribution.
Whether it was a small thing like, Thanks for walking me back from that ledge in a stressful meeting, or Thank you for working 48 hours straight to put out this fire. And that's a really good mechanism. And I think if you are engaged with your other managers and leaders within the company, you should be talking about both informal and formal ways to recognize folks.
And yes, some of it is our job to make sure our people are getting credit. But like one of the things that I don't think organizations do enough is that if you have a up and coming manager, you have a junior contributor, invite them into the management room, bring them into an executive session, let them present their work, let them get upgrades from other leaders, and managers within the company, because part of your job is exposing both their work and them to other folks who can also provide them valuable advice, something I'd recommend.
Yeah one other thing well mentioned earlier that I recognize in myself when I've BIM manager is I don't always add the context. I just take for granted that everybody understands the information around what I'm talking about, which means you miss some of those really key points to really get across what that great work is that that team is doing. So proactively recognizing that that is a limitation of mine and making the effort to add all of that context back in is what helps really profile the work of that team.
So I think there are things that being consciously aware that we do as an introvert and proactively taking steps to make sure that we minimize that can help with that as well. Think there was a comment over here. Well, I was going to ask. I love this idea of aligning extroverts and introverts, and I kind of lost myself here as an extrovert. I'm curious, like, what can I do?
I love that idea. Like, what other things can I do in order to be more attuned to or supportive of the introverts around? I love the point that Julie made earlier of doing the introductions, because that is the thing, you know, in a big, big room of people that can be so intimidating for an introvert. So actually making that step to make those 1 to 1 conversation possible is, is really valuable.
And the other thing that we've talked about is that that meeting setting where, you know, there are extroverts and introverts, if you recognize that a colleague is an introvert, but then they're not going to make their point of view heard having had that one on one conversation with them first so you understand their opinion and you can help them voice that opinion in the meeting. Make sure that there's space for that opinion to be heard is really powerful.
I'm going to give praise to Stephanie. My colleague is one of my biggest allies within the company because she will just do very simple things like. Hey, guys, we've been talking for 15 minutes. Will's been awfully quiet. Will, what do you think? Or will, when we were talking about this earlier, you made this point.
I think it would be really great for you to share. And I think it does require some coordination, but it is actually helpful to have allies who will draw you out, who will provide a bit of encouragement, or if you need someone essentially to talk through the stress and anxiety of things going into meetings, that can be really helpful. So I spent a lot of time talking with a few of my peers before I go into a board meeting, because how I show up in those board meetings, the confidence that relay the stress that may be on my face sends really strong signals to stakeholders that only agree with you for short periods of time.
So having someone that you can lean on, having someone to ask you to express your thoughts. Having someone to remind you or to provide a break in the conversation for you to jump in can be really helpful. Yeah I mean, I'm only on this panel because I've an extroverted friend who was like, oh, I know the perfect person. Right so, yeah, I mean, having, having allies, having partners, having friends around who have different strengths is always valuable.
The current aversion hind coercion. Go to the app. We do have a bunch of questions in the app. One is, can you speak to the overlap between introversion and imposter syndrome? Oh we talked about this a little bit in advance. Yeah you. To some degree.
This is actually a great audience question since we more than half of us were introverts in the room, how many of us have actually felt we had imposter syndrome at some point? Because I know for vast swaths of my career, I felt like an imposter, right? And some of that I think some of imposter syndrome is being comfortable in your own skin, feeling that your stuff, that you can communicate it effectively.
And I think it's also some degree we doubt our own merits or value, and that's tough to get over and don't know necessarily if imposter syndrome and introversion are, you know, directly linked. But I know actually a lot of extroverts that feel imposter syndrome too, but we just have to cope with it in very different ways. There was an advice there.
I'm sorry. But yeah, I mean, I feel like that's a completely that's a whole separate panel right there. I don't think I've got anything smarter now. I guess I would say this. I come from a family of crazy extroverts, and some of the advice my grandfather was in the Navy for a really long time in his retirement. He belonged to, like, every singing and dancing and card group on the face of the Earth.
And when he would see me struggling, particularly in high school or in college in my first job interviews and things, he would tell me, it's not as serious as you think and just get on with it. Right? and my advice is, if you feel like you're struggling with imposter syndrome, a bit of it's in your head. And the idea is that contributes. You have likely have a lot of value and merit to your colleagues.
So take a step. Good advice. Thank you. Yeah, please. And really good advice. That's great advice.
Don't know how many librarians are in the audience, particularly ones who are in tenure places. But we have such an introversion problem in librarianship. That problem, it's not actually it works pretty well because there are so many introverts, but occasionally it can cause us some problems, including in tenure issues, which is a place that you have to be really, really self promoting. And and so this it does become a real challenge then in which we do things like hold workshops and sort of grade each other's work and sort of force people to really work on that self promotion angle because you have to, right?
I mean, that's sort of what the tenure process is, is being able to promote your own work in a really. Yeah, really significantly so. Fortunately, I guess being in that environment where there are so many introverts, we've worked in some extra steps to make sure we're helping folks through that process. Other comments from the audience.
It will go back to the app. Any tips for handling performance, anxiety and meetings? The ability to collect thoughts on the spot and articulate thoughts. But that one think it is so comes down to preparing ahead of time, asking for agendas, asking for a specific opportunity to talk about the particular point that you want to get across.
So again, you've had a chance to think it through to prepare what you want to say, maybe asking if you can share some of those points in writing, because I think all of us will recognize we are often better on paper. So having a chance to think, think it through or share it in other ways that reactivity was, you know, reacting to on the spot questions was a real problem for me.
And I was I was finding that was holding me back in my career because I couldn't do it. So practicing those responses that you can give so you don't have to give the answer is really helpful. Just just practicing. You know, I recognize that this is something that you want more information about. Can I get back to you?
I want to think it through being really transparent about that. That's something that you need the time to think about. Similar bit of advice like it is. OK in the room, in a meeting, in a conversation to say, hold on for just one minute. I need to think this through. I do that an awful lot. And the other thing is generally, and this may be a particularly American thing, we're uncomfortable with silence, right?
You're in a room and there's silence for 45 seconds. It can be wholly terrifying. But if you embrace the silence for just a little bit, you can find yourself. You're providing yourself a window to make a contribution. Yeah, I mean, I feel like I'm just sort of repeating, but I think right there's the two pieces. One is that it's very much OK to ask for information in advance. If you can tell from like a meeting request that there's possibly the chance that you're going to need to contribute something.
It's OK to say, you know, this seems this seems like something where we're going to have an in-depth discussion or you're going to want some input or decisions. What can you give me in advance so that I'm prepared for this? And depending on the level of sort of contribution required in that meeting, it's also OK to say, you know, this is really important and I want to take some time to digest and can I get back to you by x?
Right? like it can be all right in many situations. Probably not all of them to push back a little. Right and sometimes. It it isn't working that way because people are just making assumptions, right? So if you push back, they are often likely to say, Oh yeah, didn't occur to me that maybe we should, you know, take a pause for 24 hours and everyone's going to reconvene because that's not how they work, right?
So it just takes someone being willing to sort of point it out to them. And then the practice thing. Yeah I mean, I think the, you know, the longer you're in a particular career, you start to have some sort of answers and some core information that's more sort of easily accessible to your brain and mouth in a given moment. And it just takes time and practice.
I think just one thing to add to that is I found it really helpful to tell the extroverts in those teams who wanted those responses that this is why I'm asking for this time in advance, or I'm asking you to share this in advance because you want me to help give you my best work. I will need that time to be able to give you my thoughts and my answers is to in advance what you're asking me to prepare.
Yeah and the other thing you can do is actually lay out ground rules for the meeting. So if you're in a meeting and you want an outcome to be a decision, how are you going to make that decision? So who is making the decision? What is the method that we are going to reach consensus or this is a consensus decision. Are we going to vote what the process is actually going to be?
And it seems a little awkward at first, but it can be really helpful in the room. Yeah, there's a lot of meeting facilitation that I think can be really valuable for a lot of these things. Just in thinking through how folks are interacting, going to interact, who gets the opportunity to speak, how people can contribute and think. A lot of those basics, I agree, can feel awkward at first, but if you get into a habit, you know, if you say come into a new committee and you have an opportunity to chair a committee setting that stuff up at the start it once you start doing it, it feels pretty easy.
Right Thank you all. So other comments from the audience. Yes it's OK. I we?
And well, Yeah. So too much to ask for something that really means more. I agree with that 100% Other other thoughts from the audience before we go back to the app.
All right. Another question how do you manage expectations for extroverted direct reports when you're an introvert? Looking at half of my team that's in the room. Uh, so one of the strengths of being an introvert is we've talked about you can be a good listener. You can develop really deep one on one relationships with folks.
And I think it can be a really helpful exercise at the start of a relationship or at a reset point with your direct reports to talk about how you operate. What are your ways of working? You know, telling folks that you don't show your emotions on your face, but you take things seriously, that lengthy conversations can be draining for you, but you are happy to follow up by email or by text. And I think it's actually just sharing what works for you, what your preferences are asking them, what their preferences are, how they want to work, and kind of negotiating a relationship that works for both of you and what you hope is over the course of time that you guys just know how to approach one another.
And again, something that feels awkward at first, but. You'll find a groove. Their audience questions. All right. We've got more on that. All right. If you're in an environment with no peers or allies that isn't welcoming toward introverts, how can you encourage yourself to participate and advocate for yourself?
I think that's a really important one. I asked him again, the LinkedIn community about what they saw as real, real problems. And one point that really saddened me was they felt that being an introvert had really held them back in their career because they weren't prepared to go and have conversations. I mean, Karen identified that there was the one to 1 environment where you could go and do that, and that's really powerful.
But if you don't know how to do that, that that potentially closes doors to you. So I think, um, it's really key to think about are there advocates that you can work with, you know, if that's identifying a peer who you can get, get some of that allyship from or if it's about having more senior people who can mentor you and actually help to support that career progression. I think there's ways that you need to identify how how you can manage being an introvert without holding holding you back.
Yeah mean think the mentoring piece. Right? so I'm sort of imagining in this scenario it's sort of sad, right? Like someone who doesn't feel like there's anyone locally that they can sort of rely on to help them. And I think that's when you turn to. You do actually more officially turn to groups like this, you know, and you do an actual formal mentorship in which you can be paired with someone who's going to be able to help you figure out how to get further in your career.
Yeah, it can be a very difficult thing. But share how those circumstances make you feel, that you feel like you have contributions to make, but you aren't able to make them. And to take this to an extreme, I think get into a place where you begin thinking about fit. And fit is really important in thinking about your career, your career trajectory, wanting to have know, all of us want to feel happy at work.
All of us want to feel valued at work. And sometimes we can find ourselves in situations where our fit in terms of communication, style or dynamic or approach isn't a good fit. And sometimes it's OK to recognize that. And then you have a really tough decision to make. Can you make it work, or should you find somewhere else where you may be a better fit? And that takes some soul searching.
And I know it's going to be the hardest thing ever for any of us introverts to then say, OK, if this isn't a good fit, now what do I go do? Because I'm going to have to network, I'm going to have to promote and put myself out there. But it is so important, I think, to our value, our sense of self, to belong at work and feel like you can make good, valuable contributions. So don't be afraid to call it, I guess, is what I'm saying.
Shall did I see your hand? Yes well, I just want to plug the membership program. Great program. We have to focus every year. If you can't get mentorship within your organization, that's what. Yes, over here.
Say for myself. So I'm going to put the. Thank you. Years and years.
It's you know. Yeah and the great advice someone, someone gave about asking questions is always really helpful.
But the other part is it can often be easier to build a relationship talking about non-work things. So I reminded myself of very long time ago when I was dating, I would read slate articles that reviewed kind of the latest hit T.V shows, so I'd have something to talk about. But I find myself doing that when I roll into prospecting meetings where I'm meeting with a potential client, where either I'm researching them or their business, or I'm making sure that I've at least read the top 10 headlines of the day so that you have something that is neutral, safe and top of mind just to get a.
I think when you're talking about within your organization to I'd also go back to of being willing to talk to folks work closely with about what will help you produce your best work. Right because I think that framing, even if you're working with someone with whom I don't know, maybe you don't want to talk about being an introvert or you don't want to talk about something that feels personal to you, that's fine.
But if you have ideas about what can help you produce your best work, anyone, anyone you work with who wants their work to succeed is going to be interested in hearing what you have to say about that. Right? may not get you everything you're hoping for, but they should be interested in hearing that just for their own sort of their own work as well. Yeah, I think at the end of the day, we all have to do things that we don't like doing from time to time.
And yeah, if that is putting yourself in those uncomfortable networking environments because that helps you move a conversation along. Yeah, absolutely. Just occasionally we just have to grit our teeth and get through it. And then give yourself the space afterwards that you need to recover from it. I think we have time for one more question before our closing question, which is a fun one.
OK I'm going to kind of combine two because I think they're a little related. This one's very actionable as you meet people here at SSP in other places, how do you get up the nerve to connect with people you've met, to ask for their contact information and establish connections when you have a difficult time with self-promotion and worry that others aren't interested in connecting. Add on.
LinkedIn has been mentioned a couple of times. Are there other kind of channels for networking that you've found to be very effective? I mentioned LinkedIn because I think it is really valuable. And as I've been meeting people here, I've been adding them on LinkedIn because I know even if I haven't had a chance to have those deep conversations here, I can then use that as a chance to to, to continue a discussion with them.
So I think it works really well. I know obviously there is the Whova app. And there are ways that you can connect with people that you're meeting here. But I would say LinkedIn is an ongoing channel of great communication for me. Yeah mean you don't again think it's OK if you're not able to sort of put yourself out there a lot on the spot.
Right there's ways I think to follow up afterwards maybe someone did a poster that you find really interesting, you know, send out, reach them, reach out to them afterwards, send them an email, arrange to chat with them, whatever. Um, so I think especially fortunately these days, right, with all the different sort of online ways that we can connect, you don't have to rely on don't sharing a, sharing a pinot noir in the welcome reception.
Right I think there's some other strategies that maybe don't feel as effective because we're so trained to think of what networking looks like but think can really be valuable and lead to probably the kinds of close connections that will help you in your career anyway. So I'm going to take us to our closing question, which is we were meeting in advance we thought was a really fun one. So what is the worst advice that you got in your career as an introvert?
Let me. Whoever wants to go first. We don't have an order on this one. I'm going to call out open plan working. Isn't it? Isn't it great for introverts? Make sure as an introvert you find your space to go and get the deep creative work that you need to do. Done and don't feel that, you know, if you are forced as part of your work culture to be in that open plan environment, make it clear that that's not where you're going to get that deep creative work done and allow yourself the space that hopefully most organizations have now recognized that hybrid working can be beneficial for everyone.
I think mine is sort of pegging off the back of what you were saying before about your family as just this idea that you should push through and do it anyway. Right and do we all have to some degree here or there? Yes, probably. We are all are going to do things we don't like as well. But I think part of it is being locked in by our own sort of imagination, which thinks networking has to look a certain way.
Connecting has to look a certain way. And that there are other ways to build those kinds of connections that, you know, don't have to play to your weaknesses all the time. Right? if that's not where your skill set is. Get on a committee doing work that you're really interested in and build connections with people that way. Right I mean, there's, there's, there's like other strategies besides welcome receptions, I think.
The worst advice I ever got was just will talk louder. Just be more dynamic and like, you know, you then find yourself being like a hack and you come off as being inauthentic and that potentially is worse. I mean, that definitely leads to feelings of imposter syndrome. Some of it is actually just being comfortable with your communication style. I'm a soft spoken guy and that's just who I am.
And if I try to be a showman or a carnival barker, it isn't going to work. I'm not going to be persuasive. I'm probably going to seem less credible in a sales situation or something like that. So it is just being comfortable and it's thinking about how you communicate, how you want to design a presentation. Do you want to send a note in advance?
It's reminding yourself that you have strengths and you don't have to be the gregarious showman. You can be just as successful. Excellent well, Thank you so much to our panelists. Thanks, everybody, for the amazing questions and discussion. I think this is super valuable. So
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